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Seascapes & Tablescapes

"When it comes to the sensations of the sea, we've got 'em covered: The flavor of a chilled pea soup washes over you like a wave; sea salt crackers capture the water's clean perfume; anchovy dip hints of ocean depths; and a seafood salad is like an offering from Poseidon himself."

I’m no Gourmet basher. In fact, I was kind of digging the strange dated photo-style they were using for a while (Sara Dickerman at Slate noticed too. I wish I had the wherewithal to more fully articulate these observations).

But once again, I’ve been mesmerized/baffled their bizarrely staged photo spreads. Last month, I was gripped by the overly rustic farm stand. Now, it’s a maritime theme, “Surf Sup” that’s giving me pause. There’s a fine line between eclectically sourced tableau and tablescape. I should know, I watched Sandra Lee this evening (one of the beauties of periodically working from home). Convenience food often charms rather than scares me, but her white pizza put me off, maybe it was the jarred alfredo sauce base (and when I was young enough to think nothing of fat grams, I bought 99-cent Classico alfredo sauce at Grocery Outlet like it was going out of style, um, literally)

I guess I could deal with a miniature lighthouse replica decorating a table. An old suitcase, lantern and patinad celestial globe? Not so sure. The component that pushed me over the edge, though, is the coat rack. WTF? A. You don’t need a coat or hat during August (I wanted to kill women wearing sweaters and jackets on my Monday morning commute. How does 80s with pure humidity require a second layer?) anywhere in the continental United States during daylight hours. B. You don’t need me to tell you that a coat rack has no business being outdoors on a grassy expanse.

I like the menu (I might make the anchovy lemon dip with green beans) and I even like the pert, nearly retro text. I have a hard time getting past those photos (yes, there are more) though.

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  1. ckc #

    That coat rack gives me the creeps! It’s like cray-land lunch, with something evil lurking in the lighthouse.
    Ok, admittedly, I have something against lighthouses. But still…

    August 9, 2007

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