The Scoop

  • In fourth grade someone got the bright idea of cutting lunch to an outrageous 15 minutes (as if going to a year-round school without a cafeteria wasn't enough--we ate at our desks and were served by mobile carts in the hall). To get the slow eaters (me) up to speed, our teachers implemented a charming little policy called "Shovel Time."

    The first nine minutes would pass normally. Then as the tenth approached, Miss Stauffer (a feathered-haired gal who drove a Camaro, loved Little River Band...and apparently still teaches at Hollydale Elementary) would yell, "Do you know what time it is?!" The class would manically shriek back, "SHOVEL TIME!!!" Talking was absolutely forbidden the final five minutes—it was a deathly silent scarf fest.

    I don't know if I've ever been the same since. But as a nod to this classy ritual, I've adopted the humble scooping implement as my rating system's icon. Shovel on!
    ----------------------------------
    1 Shovel=Passing Fancy
    2 Shovels=Puppy Love
    3 Shovels=Crippling Crush
    4 Shovels=Serious Stalking

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Cafe Culture

Edelstein_boys_2

Japanese creations never fail to amaze me (I’m still marveling over cucumber Pepsi and vending machine costumes as camouflage against rapists) and sometimes they double whammy me within minutes of each other.

First, I heard about Butlers Cafe where Japanese women can be treated like princesses by cute western men. Kind of Disney and creepy yet intriguing.

Shortly afterward, I was skimming Cha Xiu Bao and became even more astonished by Café Edelstein, a dreamy restaurant where geeky girls are served by faux well-bred, boarding school-educated gentlemen. The types of gay-ish boys featured in Shōnen-ai manga.

I think this is awesome because freakish fantasy services typically seem geared towards males, cosplay restaurants in particular. They just don’t do this type of thing here, at least not for grown women. Little girls have over-the-top American Girl Café but beyond grade school weirdo role playing restaurants certainly aren’t acceptable.

We just get stuck with Medieval Times.

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