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A Stroll Through Carroll Gardens

Tedhoney You know how experts on HGTV always advise homesellers to declutter and depersonalize so potential buyers will be better able to see themselves living in the space? (This common sense does not apply to Queens where it is assumed everyone likes wood paneling and/or copious statuary and/or sheets as curtains and/or a full line of Suave products lining the tub.)

The same should apply to restaurant ads. This Living Social email that showed up yesterday morning (yes, I’ve succumbed to daily deal mania and just experienced my first deal gone sour, which was bound to happen eventually) caught me off guard with its accompanying photo of Ted & Honey, a café/restaurant up the street that I’ve never had an inclination to visit.

There’s just so much going on, too much frozen action. Was this posed or was everyone caugh in the act? Why does the faded jeans guy have two iced coffees? Are the two plates of food also being brought to him? Where’s his dining partner?  Is it the tiny sweatsuit mom with a stroller as big as she is? I had a visceral reaction to her and her determined hunched shoulders as if she were about to barrel into the server full-speed. Of course, I immediately suppressed my negative assumptions because the Brooklyn child/childfree debate is cliché and unproductive for all and I’m too old and mature to mom-bash for sport, then a few hours later I read curiously toned, “A Mom Responds Before Crowding You Out of Your Local Coffeeshop/Bar” and became unsure of my emotions, then turned bile-y again with the reassurance of the equally icked-out commenters on The Hairpin, generally a place filled with smart, rational women.


In other Carroll Gardens decluttering news, I’m excited to see what Vinzee’s turns out to be. I’m also trying to figure out why Eater, in both of its mentions, refers to karaoke. Do they think that magic wand, illustrated in a shortened perspective, is a microphone?

I would also like to be excited about Café Bruno, the latest business taking over that doomed spot on Henry and Union streets, but can’t quite figure out what it will be like beyond this all purpose mission: "We want this to be a place that people feel comfortable, a place where you can come with your girlfriend, your kids or your friends."

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